so I havent been able to write for a while just been so busy with life.. i feel like i live at the doctors . between OB appts and kids appts. so we will start with the kids .. Savanna just had her 4 year well visit she got 4 shots and a finger prick to check her iron. All the shots were boosters from her 1 year shots. she did great with everything she finally broke the 30 lb mark and now is 32 lbs 3 feet 3 inch her speech is right on schedule for a 4 yr old. shes finally back at school after being sick and then going on leave to md had 5 bday partys this year.
Madelyn is doing well she was fully potty trained before we went on leave but has regressed some and thats okay. she will get back on track shes getting there now. she is around 30 lbs and 3 ft ... she is so eager to go to school with sister savanna :) ... so come december we willl register her and they will be in the same class...
so that comes to me and the pregnancy I am doing well i have gained 15 lbs already im 28 wks along so thats not to bad. I seem to be all baby again which is good hopefully ill lose all my baby weight and some after baby come. we have been buying things lil by lil at a time... we have had a dresser since we got before i found out i was prego we bought a changing table and a rock and play sleeper a bath tub and a highchair all for under $80! i wish we would of kept stuff from savanna like the tub high chair her crib n changing table were recalled when maddie was 8 months so we had to get rid of those. we bought the carseat its cute its orange and grey. a chicco keyfit 30. at my 20 week scan baby was doing well and everything looked perfect:).. the girls are so excited for baby to come they are going to help paint the clouds on babys wall :) we are making the nursery like a outside them blue walls with green on the bottom for grass rainbows trees clouds and trying to find nature decals. hubby has painted 2 walls will paint the small 2 this weekend and then the last 2 next weekend after we get more paint. so by october i can start organizing things. this weekend is a 3 day weekend for hubby so hell have from today after work off till tuesday then hell work tuesday wed thrus and have friday-monday off so we are hoping to get things done painting wise this weekend he is also going to prime the front room we are going to set up a temp nursery there so when we are downstairs the baby can have somewhere to be safe when im doing stuff so the girls cant bother the baby. im hoping to get a good used crib for 30$ if its in good working condition. I go back to my OB sept 4 then i will be going weekly again. baby kicks alot so i know they are okay. which is a huge relief. im scared of having another section. but im more scared of losing another baby. or that i will go into labor on my own that scares me. since i only trust 1 dr doing my section i want to make it to my c section date which hopefully soon i will have :) well i think thats it for now i need to search for nursing shirts and stuff to make my c /s easy recovery :)
Our little family
savanna is
we've been married
madelyn is
our sweet cameron went to jesus
Friday, August 24, 2012
Tuesday, June 5, 2012
the last 3 months
well first off lets start with the girls Savanna has learned to ride her bike all on her own.she now knows how to get her helmet and put it on correctly and get on her bike and just ride without us holding on to it :). She is getting so big! ... She is doing so well in school and still loves going she can't wait for school to come.
Madelyn- she got fully potty trained in a week so we didn't have any diapers for 3 wks at all then she regressed but we are getting there... she can now count to 15.. she does so well wearing her glasses now I'm so proud and sad that my baby isn't a baby anymore. she loves to just be outside playing ....
brings us to us... we have decided to down size since we are probably moving back home in the next yr or two. and we moved the girls in the same room since they like it better that way. we have been busy with drs apts and such hubby got hurt a few weeks ago doing his PFT he twisted his knee and injured in ACL. SO everything has been on me and I'm so emotional right now with camerons first angelversary/ birthday coming up and everyone inviting us to their kids first birthdays and we just can't handle going to birthdays right now its just to hard on us emotionally. I can't believe he has been gone for 10 months and the pain is still the same as it was when it happened it not worse i see everyones kids growing up and hitting all the milestones and knowing I will never experience that . i love him and miss him every day my heart breaks all over again every day when i think of what should of been and how the girls talk about him and ask why he died and their friends babies didn't die.
on a good note my husbands vasectomy reversal worked and we got pregnant in February! so we are due around thanksgiving there are so many emotions with this pregnancy. we are thrilled and scared just trying to get day by day. My ob has been our rock through all of this and has really helped us whenever we need and is taken full care of my pregnancy to ensure it ends with us having a healthy baby at the end. We have decided not to find out the Sex of the baby so it could be a surprise we are not sure if this wil be our last or not. well i think thats all for now :)
Madelyn- she got fully potty trained in a week so we didn't have any diapers for 3 wks at all then she regressed but we are getting there... she can now count to 15.. she does so well wearing her glasses now I'm so proud and sad that my baby isn't a baby anymore. she loves to just be outside playing ....
brings us to us... we have decided to down size since we are probably moving back home in the next yr or two. and we moved the girls in the same room since they like it better that way. we have been busy with drs apts and such hubby got hurt a few weeks ago doing his PFT he twisted his knee and injured in ACL. SO everything has been on me and I'm so emotional right now with camerons first angelversary/ birthday coming up and everyone inviting us to their kids first birthdays and we just can't handle going to birthdays right now its just to hard on us emotionally. I can't believe he has been gone for 10 months and the pain is still the same as it was when it happened it not worse i see everyones kids growing up and hitting all the milestones and knowing I will never experience that . i love him and miss him every day my heart breaks all over again every day when i think of what should of been and how the girls talk about him and ask why he died and their friends babies didn't die.
on a good note my husbands vasectomy reversal worked and we got pregnant in February! so we are due around thanksgiving there are so many emotions with this pregnancy. we are thrilled and scared just trying to get day by day. My ob has been our rock through all of this and has really helped us whenever we need and is taken full care of my pregnancy to ensure it ends with us having a healthy baby at the end. We have decided not to find out the Sex of the baby so it could be a surprise we are not sure if this wil be our last or not. well i think thats all for now :)
Monday, February 27, 2012
spring is coming
so its been almost two weeks since I have been on here. we have been really busy lately... this weekend we re arranged the whole house i like it a lot better now. Hubby and I really need to get a King size bed cuz co-sleeping in a queen just isn't working well... but that will wait till we have money... we cleaned the girls rooms and shampooed savannas bed and floor... and went through stuff and are selling it.. we do not use anymore. we have been spending all the nice 70 degree days outside playing and this week we learn about dinosaurs! last week we learned about birds and made bird feeders they loved it !!
savanna- she has grown so unbelievably much these past 2 weeks she now doesn't use a potty ring at all anymore... she says mommy I'm a big girl i don't need a potty ring those are for babies. her speech is improving tremendously! she helps put her clothes away and puts them in the baskets when she take them off she loves to help me clean windows and floors :).. she also LOVES to pick and tease her sister!!! they play well together till one of them starts teasing the other and taking things away.
madelyn- she has been using the potty a lot and this week we are going to really try the potty training she abs HATES to be in diapers and as soon as one drop gets on her pull-up /diaper she freaks out! she freaks if anything is out of place or if there are flower petals on the ground its cute ebut frustrating. she is finally not biting AS MUCH as she was before ... and she's talking more and more.. she tells us more jue ( more drink) its cute cuz thats what savanna use to say to . and she says pee pee when she's going pee or thinks she needs to so now we can go and put her on the potty. she has also figured how to open the fridge and get the juice n milk out so were now had to buy a lock till she learns not to weve been teaching her that she can't ... but she's only 2 my mom bought her a dresser so she could have her own finally and i can't thank her enough...
us- well we have been really good... trying not to stress on if his surgery worked we won't know for another 2 weeks... my depression has really set in bad... some days and others I'm okay.. i really miss my son more than every he should almost be 7 months and I'm okay with newborns but not 7 month olds so my friends kids i just don't see them as that. I'm really lonely here while hubby is at work .. it stinks but i have my girls I'm hoping i can get these next few lbs off and keep them off soon... we start working out together today... we are buying a dresser and kids picnic table this week from our neighbors... now we are looking for a sand/water table slides... and othe outside toys :) for the girls we plan to be outside a lot this spring and summer we need to start looking for a lawnmower. also we are going to start our own gardens we are going to get the girls a green house and let them grow some stuff :) i know they will love it they love watching things grow.. we are still financially strapped but things are getting paid on time at least :) well that is all for now I'm going to get up and start getting ready :)
savanna- she has grown so unbelievably much these past 2 weeks she now doesn't use a potty ring at all anymore... she says mommy I'm a big girl i don't need a potty ring those are for babies. her speech is improving tremendously! she helps put her clothes away and puts them in the baskets when she take them off she loves to help me clean windows and floors :).. she also LOVES to pick and tease her sister!!! they play well together till one of them starts teasing the other and taking things away.
madelyn- she has been using the potty a lot and this week we are going to really try the potty training she abs HATES to be in diapers and as soon as one drop gets on her pull-up /diaper she freaks out! she freaks if anything is out of place or if there are flower petals on the ground its cute ebut frustrating. she is finally not biting AS MUCH as she was before ... and she's talking more and more.. she tells us more jue ( more drink) its cute cuz thats what savanna use to say to . and she says pee pee when she's going pee or thinks she needs to so now we can go and put her on the potty. she has also figured how to open the fridge and get the juice n milk out so were now had to buy a lock till she learns not to weve been teaching her that she can't ... but she's only 2 my mom bought her a dresser so she could have her own finally and i can't thank her enough...
us- well we have been really good... trying not to stress on if his surgery worked we won't know for another 2 weeks... my depression has really set in bad... some days and others I'm okay.. i really miss my son more than every he should almost be 7 months and I'm okay with newborns but not 7 month olds so my friends kids i just don't see them as that. I'm really lonely here while hubby is at work .. it stinks but i have my girls I'm hoping i can get these next few lbs off and keep them off soon... we start working out together today... we are buying a dresser and kids picnic table this week from our neighbors... now we are looking for a sand/water table slides... and othe outside toys :) for the girls we plan to be outside a lot this spring and summer we need to start looking for a lawnmower. also we are going to start our own gardens we are going to get the girls a green house and let them grow some stuff :) i know they will love it they love watching things grow.. we are still financially strapped but things are getting paid on time at least :) well that is all for now I'm going to get up and start getting ready :)
Thursday, February 16, 2012
bedroom decorating crafting
So savanna decided she wanted a Dora room instead of a Tinkerbelle room luckily the green still goes :) .. and she already had Dora sheets so that part was already done ... we got some wall appliqués and put them on her walls tonight she's in love :) then next month we are going to get her some wall art and some other things for it :)..... we put the yellow curtains up that we were given by my aunt and they match perfect along with the lamp shade she gave us is yellow with pink green and blue on it i believe. and then well have the comforter in her room too this weekend :)..
Oh coarse this all started when we were trying to figure out what to do with madelyns room and IF we have another baby we want the girls rooms to look nice and we want them to enjoy their rooms we found a cute bed set and she can keep the sheets she has and we will get her the comforter , curtains, rug, and find some wall art for her too.. we are going to paint her walls this weekend :) it should be fun I love doing things for them :) and she's pretty excited about it already :) as well as we are going to well my hubby is going to finish building the girls doll beds and ill paint them :) ... then the next project will be doll highchairs ... so excited for my girls and can't wati to have all these built they LOVE their stools :)
we also started Homeschooling stuff too.. everyday the girls and I sit down well m-f ... and go over colors numbers abc words addition reading stories savanna and I are working on recognizing letters and sounding out words :D she is doing well and LOVES to learn and do art work.. tomorrow we are doing the letter A and color Red which was for this week. and I started making even more neat things i have found to try and keep things more neat... I have to make time for myself everyday so i don't get overwhelmed I am also hoping that this weekend I will have time to start on camerons scrapbook that we bought him... I'm debating if I want to do it of just sell it and keep his precious pictures in a album... that we can add to for a while. either way I need to work on madelyns as well and savannas Im a lil behind and I would like to make some wipes and some small blankets this weekend as well so many projects I would one to do .. and trying to figure out easy crockpot healthy meals is kinda hard but il get it I'm going to go buy chicken tomm and probably make some chicken stew this weekend :) well thats all for now I'm going to bed as always I love you so much cameron you are the shining star that twinkles at us
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
valentines day
It actually went well... the girls loved their gifts! after we took savanna to school madelyn and me had a little outting we went to the Dollar tree and to Walmart to get them valentines day stuff... and balloons. Then we came home and put it all together and then it was time to go pick up savanna from school and go get daddy from work. we did that savanna had tons of cute valentines from all her friends at school and made a big heart for me... she loves school so much :) ... We came home and they opened their gifts from us they loved them :) them madelyn broke savannas globe... so we have to buy her a new one... then we went to ruby tuesday for dinner then went to walmart to get there girls some more learning stuff :)
the daycare where savanna goes to school is saying she HAS to get a flu shot and she can't cuz she gets hives from the shot and tamiflu ( the meds they give u to help beat the flu ) so now i have a month to get the paperwork to get it waived and hope they take it well they will or she won't be going anymore...
we also got cameron a lil monkey for his first valentines day in heaven i hope he knows how much he is loved and missed
the daycare where savanna goes to school is saying she HAS to get a flu shot and she can't cuz she gets hives from the shot and tamiflu ( the meds they give u to help beat the flu ) so now i have a month to get the paperwork to get it waived and hope they take it well they will or she won't be going anymore...
Monday, February 13, 2012
2-13-2012
I can't believe its been 6.5 months since we lost our sweet cameron. Everyone that was pregnant with me is starting to plan first birthday parties for their baby while I'm backtracking on why i lost my baby and trying to grieve. We still haven't even come close to paying off his headstone and some people think that we should of already done so... but how can when we have bills that have to be paid I'm not saying his headstone isn't important CUZ ITS ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS EVER FOR US. but when our LIVING children need something or we need food on the table i have to put those things first all my kids come before we do anything fun. I have been told to put the money we would of spent monthly on having a baby here on his stone a month now what money are you referring to? Diapers we use cloth already bought for our last child... formula.... I would be breast feeding .. wipes we use cloth wipes .... clothes i bought enough to last the first 18 months of his life.. and bout most from the yardsale sight so we didn't have to spend money on just him... we spend around 150 every 2 weeks on groceries we are on wic... after our bills the ones we pay to live we have 200 for 2 wks thats 1 tank of gas and 2 wks of groceries so i would love to know how we can "pay the money we would on him "... YES we got life insurance BUT THAT COVERED THE FUNERAL AND TRAVEL expenses unless you personally have seen what bills we have and how we live and BTW WE LIVE BELOW OUR MEANS!!!! we use cloth everything but toilet paper! most of our kids "expensive toys" were bought second hand... we build everything we can like we just built 2 steps tools for their bathrooms.... now were building beds for their dolls which only costing 10 bucks to build 1 set of beds for their dolls vs the 30 for store bought... we are BUILDING THEM A PLAYHOUSE COSTING 40$ TOPS and we have CHILD SUPPORT TO PAY and i don't care about that! his other 2 children are very important to us! i have to pay copays and stuff for my medical and have been having tons of problems health wise... but that was coming last and now i have to put myself on the same level as my kids or I won't be here with them.
WE HAVE regrets about how we handled camerons untimely death... we wish we would of had him cremated for a few reasons. reason 1 it was a lot cheaper... Reason 2 the most important we wouldn't of had to bury him away from us he would be in a urn and right here in our home. and reason 3 we wouldn't have to worry about a headstone. theres nothing we can do now. i just wish he wasn't in the cold ground.
savanna and madelyn - they were both sick yesterday with fevers ect. but madelyn is 100% better today and savanna broke her fever but is still sleeping.
and don't get me wrong we make it and are beginning to do a cash system and couponing more so we spend less on food we just lost wic from me that we used! thats 10 $ of Fruits/vegs and 5.5 gallons of milk that we no longer get. we eat ALOT healthier now and eat all fresh stuff.. I'm trying to lose weight and its becoming harder and harder with all this stress and people putting me down ect
WE HAVE regrets about how we handled camerons untimely death... we wish we would of had him cremated for a few reasons. reason 1 it was a lot cheaper... Reason 2 the most important we wouldn't of had to bury him away from us he would be in a urn and right here in our home. and reason 3 we wouldn't have to worry about a headstone. theres nothing we can do now. i just wish he wasn't in the cold ground.
savanna and madelyn - they were both sick yesterday with fevers ect. but madelyn is 100% better today and savanna broke her fever but is still sleeping.
and don't get me wrong we make it and are beginning to do a cash system and couponing more so we spend less on food we just lost wic from me that we used! thats 10 $ of Fruits/vegs and 5.5 gallons of milk that we no longer get. we eat ALOT healthier now and eat all fresh stuff.. I'm trying to lose weight and its becoming harder and harder with all this stress and people putting me down ect
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Busy lives !
things have been hectic trying to get everything under control around here. We moved My dresser to the Savannas room for both the girls clothes. so Now i have my 2 drawer end table and thats it ; which is fine for me seeing how i don't have many clothes .. lol I went through my clothes and got rid of all the things to big and to small. which made me feel good getting rid of things that made me depressed.. either that I've gotten that big and that i can't fit in that anymore. but I have had 3 kids in 3 yrs. I started a knew program 30 days and trying to learn to eat better.
Savanna has started back at school and she LOVES it she can't wait to go. This week she gets an extra day/night at school Rob and I are going to a class called love language. A free class offered on base with free dinner and childcare :) .... what could be better today is our 5 yr anniversary!.... we are doing pretty good have had our ups and downs but we pull through we both miss cameron a lot and so do the girls Our friends just had a baby boy and savanna keeps asking why her brother went to jesus and theirs didn't I don't know how to answer that!... it breaks my heart more seeing them hurting. i wish we could go back in time and he would be here. our girls are getting so big and learning so much savanna is very interested in Jesus and God now she loves reading stories about them. I am so happy she loves Jesus specially after knowing that her brother went to be with him. I know one day madelyn will too :) we have started our own art .school days here at home as well... this week we are doing A and the number 1 and valentines day arts n crafts Monday the made hands and I wrote everything they love.... today we are going to make hand flowers. and friday we are doing Heart wreaths :) the girls absolutely LOVE doing art
Rob has started online school and should have his bachelors degree by dec 2014 and I start hopefully in march! taking 2 online classes through the comm college here and getting my Rn to BSN then applying for Med school.
We are finally on the right track financially... we are getting rid of 2 bills ( 2 credit cards for that matter ) catching up on two loans and paying bills with our tax refund we got TODAY! We still have a lot to take care of and get rid of but we are on the right track.. which makes me happy Our goal is to be out of debt by the end of the year one bill at a time and to pay off camerons headstone so we can have it made and placed by his 2nd birthday.
me- I finally got to the drs and have to be seen by a ent my ears are so clogged the dr couldn't even see my ear drum which would explain my balance issues LOL.... also i had my thyroid checked to see if its messed up and thats why I'm having issues losing weight
me- I finally got to the drs and have to be seen by a ent my ears are so clogged the dr couldn't even see my ear drum which would explain my balance issues LOL.... also i had my thyroid checked to see if its messed up and thats why I'm having issues losing weight
well I guess thats it for now will post pics later
much love
Thursday, February 2, 2012
Doctors appointments and babies
well we will start off with Madelyn since it was her 2 yr visit I can't believe my baby is 2! She is a very healthy 34 inch 27.8 lb toddler speaking up a storm climbing painting. She is growing up so fast she is learning things daily the doctor is very pleased with how she has grown she was a 5 lb 11.9 oz baby girl when she was born. and they were all worried about her. while she was a baby she always had to get weight checks cuz she was so tiny when they weighted her today they were surprised she has caught up to her big sister. :) they said she looked perfect and was healthy. she had to get 1 shot yesterday so it wasn't bad then had to get her finger pricked for iron levels for wic. she did pretty well got 2 lollypops and a sticker. :) She wasn't even cranky after her shot :)
savanna we went in because some of you know she's a toe walker well the dr checked all her tendons out and she has full range so its more preference; and we just have to work on her walking flat footed. then she had to get her finger pricked to.. she was such a big girl sat all alone in the big chair and when gave the guy her hand to prick and didn't cry. ( very proud moment my 3 yr old didn't cry during getting poked! all she said was Ouch they put a bandaid on her and we were on our way home :)
they played zoo well together yesterday was beautiful and we played outside a lot :) they painted made flowers out of tp rolls :)
then for the babies part my 2 neighbors here both had lil boys the one connected to me just had hers on camerons 6 months... and the one on the other side of her just had hers yesterday ... makes me miss cameron more n more but I am so happy for them both :) and am so happy that their babies are safe ... they are two beautiful lil boys and I will probably meet them both today :D
and finally MADELYN JUST PEED ON THE POTTY FOR THE FIRST TIME :)
savanna we went in because some of you know she's a toe walker well the dr checked all her tendons out and she has full range so its more preference; and we just have to work on her walking flat footed. then she had to get her finger pricked to.. she was such a big girl sat all alone in the big chair and when gave the guy her hand to prick and didn't cry. ( very proud moment my 3 yr old didn't cry during getting poked! all she said was Ouch they put a bandaid on her and we were on our way home :)
they played zoo well together yesterday was beautiful and we played outside a lot :) they painted made flowers out of tp rolls :)
then for the babies part my 2 neighbors here both had lil boys the one connected to me just had hers on camerons 6 months... and the one on the other side of her just had hers yesterday ... makes me miss cameron more n more but I am so happy for them both :) and am so happy that their babies are safe ... they are two beautiful lil boys and I will probably meet them both today :D
and finally MADELYN JUST PEED ON THE POTTY FOR THE FIRST TIME :)
Monday, January 30, 2012
our family
So A good bit has been going on in our lives we have been so thrilled with our life lately.
My Husband and I are getting ready to celebrate 5 years since we got together. those five years have been very hard but we were strong and made it through. we've had our fair share of financial struggles , relationship struggles but what relationship doesn't. 5 years ago when we met we immediately knew we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together. we hit it off right away that was february 8 2007. Now were coming up on february 8 2012 ! with everything we have gone through I know a lot of people haven't stayed together with the same things we have gone through. I am so glad we did. He still gives me butterflies in my stomach we are hoping to go out as a family for our 5 year to dinner and then come home and put the kids to bed or we will order in and make it a no phones comp movie night with the kids.
I have been extremely tried lately loss of appetite ocd very low energy and i have no idea why. I try and work out daily today was not one of the days i could. yesterday whooped my booty.
Savanna is growing up so fast! I can't believe how big she has gotten in the 6 months. her vocabulary has grown so much and she is fully out of diapers completely she has been out of diapers at night for the last week now and doing amazing ! she's even pooping on the potty finally those that have known me for at least a yr know how hard we have worked for her not to be scared anymore. she goes with no problems which make me a very happy mommy! my little girl is growing up so much. We are concerned because she will only walk on her toes and seems to not be able to walk on her feet so she has a doctors apt this week to find out whats going on. she is finally going back to school tomorrow after being gone for over a month!
Madelyn oh my little miss Madelyn she thinks she's bigger than she is. she is starting to somewhat use the potty.. she absolutely despises diapers to the point if we use a disposable she tears it off if we use velcro cloth she tears it off. she loves the trainers I think because it gives her the more of a I'm not a baby feeling. and she can feel when she starts to pee and trys to stop n go potty we've only caught 2 pees in the potty so far. the rest is on the floor she's starting to get she's not suppose to pee on the floor. also she is becoming a little girl not a baby anymore her words are expanding by the day. and she learns more each day i can't believe a yr ago she wasn't walking and only saying 2 words. now she said about 15-20 words. she is our little meanie too .. she bites and hits her sister and laughs her booty its so cute but so stinking rotten lol
cameron will be 6 months old in heaven tomorrow and we will be doing a big balloon release for him we miss him more and more everyday and know one day we will be re united with him and GOD but not till our time here is done. i love you so much baby boy
well that is all for now savanna is crying cuz she doesn't wanna clean up her toys
My Husband and I are getting ready to celebrate 5 years since we got together. those five years have been very hard but we were strong and made it through. we've had our fair share of financial struggles , relationship struggles but what relationship doesn't. 5 years ago when we met we immediately knew we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together. we hit it off right away that was february 8 2007. Now were coming up on february 8 2012 ! with everything we have gone through I know a lot of people haven't stayed together with the same things we have gone through. I am so glad we did. He still gives me butterflies in my stomach we are hoping to go out as a family for our 5 year to dinner and then come home and put the kids to bed or we will order in and make it a no phones comp movie night with the kids.
I have been extremely tried lately loss of appetite ocd very low energy and i have no idea why. I try and work out daily today was not one of the days i could. yesterday whooped my booty.
Savanna is growing up so fast! I can't believe how big she has gotten in the 6 months. her vocabulary has grown so much and she is fully out of diapers completely she has been out of diapers at night for the last week now and doing amazing ! she's even pooping on the potty finally those that have known me for at least a yr know how hard we have worked for her not to be scared anymore. she goes with no problems which make me a very happy mommy! my little girl is growing up so much. We are concerned because she will only walk on her toes and seems to not be able to walk on her feet so she has a doctors apt this week to find out whats going on. she is finally going back to school tomorrow after being gone for over a month!
Madelyn oh my little miss Madelyn she thinks she's bigger than she is. she is starting to somewhat use the potty.. she absolutely despises diapers to the point if we use a disposable she tears it off if we use velcro cloth she tears it off. she loves the trainers I think because it gives her the more of a I'm not a baby feeling. and she can feel when she starts to pee and trys to stop n go potty we've only caught 2 pees in the potty so far. the rest is on the floor she's starting to get she's not suppose to pee on the floor. also she is becoming a little girl not a baby anymore her words are expanding by the day. and she learns more each day i can't believe a yr ago she wasn't walking and only saying 2 words. now she said about 15-20 words. she is our little meanie too .. she bites and hits her sister and laughs her booty its so cute but so stinking rotten lol
cameron will be 6 months old in heaven tomorrow and we will be doing a big balloon release for him we miss him more and more everyday and know one day we will be re united with him and GOD but not till our time here is done. i love you so much baby boy
well that is all for now savanna is crying cuz she doesn't wanna clean up her toys
Saturday, January 28, 2012
blanket drive
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we are doing a blanket drive in camerons name for his 1st birthday please click on the link to see more about it thank you
we are doing a blanket drive in camerons name for his 1st birthday please click on the link to see more about it thank you
Friday, January 27, 2012
mollie gross; and potty training
so tonight is Mollie Gross I am so excited! specially thanks to a awesome friend they are watching our girlies for us ! Yesterday I started getting our bills and such organized so we can get on track this year. We have a lot of debt and are trying to get rid off all debt other than our car this year between now and next years takes we will be getting rid of 2 full bills and almost 1 more. I am ready for financial freedom and not be so stressed. I want to be able to go and buy my kids things when they need it and not have to say well when we get paid they will. They have clothes and food n tons of toys but i love when we can take them out on a family day to the aquarium so they can learn about sea animals. I am debating if I want to take savanna out of school and homeschool her till kindergarden, or even till 1st grade only because i want them to know more than they are taught in school I want my kids to learn more than numbers , abcs , and how to color in numbers and I feel as a parent that you are responsible for teaching your children not someone else. i am currently looking in to it all. I love that she loves preschool right now for interaction with other children. so we will probably keep her in there for that twice a week for 3 hrs.
another note savanna has been in panties all night for 3 nights night 1 n 3 she woke up dry after 7-9 hours of sleep. night two she drank to much and had a tiny accident. I am so proud of her for not wearing diapers anymore! we are currently going to start introducing the potty to maddie and she is loving it but not peeing on it we got her a small one and she doesn't care for it. I am sure she will once she gets use to peeing in the potty and not on the floor you ask her where she suppose to pee at and she says floor and potty so she will get there she's starting to feel when she has to go potty but hasn't figured out how to force it out when she gets on the potty well thats it i gotta get up and get the kids ready :)
god bless
thinking of cameron every moment <3
another note savanna has been in panties all night for 3 nights night 1 n 3 she woke up dry after 7-9 hours of sleep. night two she drank to much and had a tiny accident. I am so proud of her for not wearing diapers anymore! we are currently going to start introducing the potty to maddie and she is loving it but not peeing on it we got her a small one and she doesn't care for it. I am sure she will once she gets use to peeing in the potty and not on the floor you ask her where she suppose to pee at and she says floor and potty so she will get there she's starting to feel when she has to go potty but hasn't figured out how to force it out when she gets on the potty well thats it i gotta get up and get the kids ready :)
god bless
thinking of cameron every moment <3
Thursday, January 26, 2012
switching to cloth
So we have recently made a lot of changes in our household. We no longer are buying paper towel or baby wipes. we are going to be using cloth wipes for madelyn and microfiber towels and flat diapers for cleaning the house. Also I have decided to take the plunge and use mama cloth which some of you might not know but they are cloth pads for menstration. I will still use tampons cause i can't wrap my mind around a diva cup. We are starting to potty train madelyn she abs hates wearing diapers so we bought her a potty last night and are going to start letting her get use to it then this weekend we won't be going anywhere and we will be trying to get her use to the potty. we trained savanna in under a week so were going to start on saturday and hoping by next saturday she will be trained and telling us when she has to go pee. we are working on savanna not peeing herself at night time as well.. night 1 she did amazing only a couple sips of water and she went pee on the potty and woke up dry. night 2 (she's still sleeping ) she had a tiny accident and didn't wake up so its going to be a work in progress but she will get there we aren't putting a diaper on her anymore though it'll be a lot of laundry for a while but i think this is the best way to get her night trained... cuz with the cloth trainers... she just pees in it without a care well thats about it for now
Sunday, January 22, 2012
jan 21 and 22
January 21 was madelyns 2nd birthday I still can't believe my baby girl is already 2 it seems like i was just contemplating going in cuz i THOUGHT my water was leaking and it was. My two best friend were there for my laboring and birth of our baby girl madelyn. she has grown up so fast. We had a small party for her on her birthday. it was nice quiet and fun :) I miss our baby boy more on days like that cuz I know hell never have a "real birthday party" But it also makes me see how much all these little things mean as your kids grow up. A week ago madelyn was still saying one word phrases and now she says two works at a time. she is starting to use the potty and HATES a diaper on. We are switching to cloth trainers we used cloth diapers and have loved them will never go back to disposables again. She loves the cloth we put a disposable and she screamed and cried till it was off and a cloth was on her.
jan 22..
today i worked on getting the house organized and cleaned up i got our laundry room organized and the upstairs cleaned tomorrow i have a few calls to make and just normal mom/wife chores to do and will be organizing our big closet. :) I am also selling a few of my bum genius 4.0 diapers they are great but we need to get some trainers and hoping she's trained within the next few months.
jan 22..
today i worked on getting the house organized and cleaned up i got our laundry room organized and the upstairs cleaned tomorrow i have a few calls to make and just normal mom/wife chores to do and will be organizing our big closet. :) I am also selling a few of my bum genius 4.0 diapers they are great but we need to get some trainers and hoping she's trained within the next few months.
Thursday, January 19, 2012
jan 14-20
well things have been extremely HECTIC around here this past week. We are now back in our own home... I had to unpack everything and finally have gotten everything put away almost . I have a the girls bedrooms left. I went through and am pretty much getting rid of all their old toys since they got SO much for Christmas. Hubby is healing still and we are starting to POTTY TRAIN Madelyn. She will be 2 on sat its SO hard to believe. I made the girls charts that a friend did for her daughter and they are working wonderful! I made my own laundry soap the other day... next i will be trying my own dishwasher soap... we are getting new ideas every day. trying to be as natural as possible for our sanity and saving money. I am currently on the look for a good salsa recipe to make my own salsa. i go through so much i would love some home made salsa. and spaghetti sauce.... I'm trying to learn to crochet and embroider better so i can start making and selling things.... we are trying to become more crafty and building more stuff for the kids n our house instead of buying everything again the less we buy the more we save... for example the laundry detergent i made cost us under 10 bucks and will probably last us 10-12 months! all we have to do is buy fabric softener if we choose. so the completed projects this week were the girls charts laundry soap start on maddies bday shirt paint the dinning room back white... well I started to pain but now ran out of white so we Will have to wait... also we got tickets to go see Mollie gross a military wife comedian. we are really hoping to find a sitter so we can go... We filed our taxes and a Lil bummed about what we are getting back but its okay well make it work just means we can't pay for Cameron's headstone which if anyone wants to donate ill post our pay pal for him at the end.... the girls are loving being home... we are having a lil birthday party for madelyn on her birthday it feels like yesterday that i was in labor with her...
we can use any help we have a lil under 2000 left to pay and our goal is to raise enough that we can pay for camerons stone and then the rest will go to donations such as molly bears or under matthews wing
https://www.paypal.com/us/cgi-bin/webscr?cmd=_flow&SESSION=kScKPyostVXA37fmYD5Qi7LRxJ9OobWfZJKvnFv1RtDzdHJWc5n41mIiDfW&dispatch=5885d80a13c0db1f8e263663d3faee8db2b24f7b84f1819343fd6c338b1d9d60
http://www.mollybears.com/ donation we would sent to after to :)
https://www.wepay.com/donations/80154
thank you for reading this
we can use any help we have a lil under 2000 left to pay and our goal is to raise enough that we can pay for camerons stone and then the rest will go to donations such as molly bears or under matthews wing
https://www.paypal.com/us/cgi-bin/webscr?cmd=_flow&SESSION=kScKPyostVXA37fmYD5Qi7LRxJ9OobWfZJKvnFv1RtDzdHJWc5n41mIiDfW&dispatch=5885d80a13c0db1f8e263663d3faee8db2b24f7b84f1819343fd6c338b1d9d60
http://www.mollybears.com/ donation we would sent to after to :)
https://www.wepay.com/donations/80154
thank you for reading this
Friday, January 13, 2012
jan 12 &13
well the last two days have been pretty boring since hubby is on bed rest from his reversal. he is doing pretty well in pain but he's doing well. the girls have been super cranky I'm guessing from just being cooped up around the house today we did their stone for camerons grave... Tommorrow we are going have madelyn her birthday party. Its elmo theme. I can't believe she will be 2 in a week then 10 days cameron will be an angel for 6 months :(. we are heading back to north carolina on sunday morning... its going to be a long day with hubby still recovering from surgery. please keep us in your prayers that his reversal works and we get our rainbow lots of love
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
jan 10&11
So I didn't post yesterday... we were super busy getting everything in order for hubby's surgery today. Today we had to be at the surgery center at 0545 (am for those don't know military time ) they took him back about 0730 and then his day of surgery started. the Dr came and talked to me about 1015 and told me everything went well. then around 11 they got me when they were taking him back to his room. we were out of there by 1230 so overall wasn't to bad i got some reading done and some photos organized on my computer to make a video of our first few years together. I'm reading a book about marriages called his needs her needs its about "affair proof marriage. expelling how couples think and react to situations. Its very interesting as to how men ad women think so differently on the same subjects.
My mom watched the girls so they wouldn't be so bored and running around misbehaving. So they wet shopping with grandma today; they both got adorable fleece jackets and outfits. Savanna got a strawberry shortcake one and Madelyn a Elmo one Elmo n cars ( the movie ) are Maddie's biggest things she loves right now. savanna loves Dora Disney princess's n cars the movie too. we came home to my moms and hubby slept for a while the girls played now were watching movies n relaxing waiting for them to fall asleep
My mom watched the girls so they wouldn't be so bored and running around misbehaving. So they wet shopping with grandma today; they both got adorable fleece jackets and outfits. Savanna got a strawberry shortcake one and Madelyn a Elmo one Elmo n cars ( the movie ) are Maddie's biggest things she loves right now. savanna loves Dora Disney princess's n cars the movie too. we came home to my moms and hubby slept for a while the girls played now were watching movies n relaxing waiting for them to fall asleep
Monday, January 9, 2012
Bethesda Military Hospital
So today was very eventful and exhausting; First we got up got everyone ready. Then we loaded up the kids and everything for a day out. We went to Bethesda military hospital for my husbands pre-op. As some of you know He got a vasectomy when we were pregnant with cameron. Well we got on the list for a Reversal in October 2011. There was a 18 month wait for something we were told the military did not cover or do. They bumped him up the 18 month wait because of our situation with having a still born child. It has been 6 months since his vasectomy and he gets his reversal on wednesday. So when we got there the base was VERY confusing; we drove around trying to find the place (good thing we were 2 hrs early). We found it then went to the NEX (MCX for Marines ). walked around there for about 30 mins wasting time. then we got back in the car and thought we were headed back to the hospital well we ended up off base again in a not so good area and it was snowing so people forgot how to drive. We finally got back to the base and back to the building we needed after 15 mins driving around the parking garage finding a spot on the roof of the garage. We went to the building we thought it was in asked the information desk lady... and she thought we said NUEROLOGY and we kept telling her no UROLOGY! well she said it was in the next building about a block away so we turned around went outside walked as fast as we could to the other building only to walk around there and find out we were in the right place the first time so we ran back to the other building having 20 mins to get there and find the urology clinic. we finally found it and got seated and waited. when they called us there was a man sitting in the way and I couldn't get the stroller past him. so i had to ask him to move not 1 but 3 times before he got up. then we talked to the Dr. about the surgery and all. and its 95% OF THE time effective. its a very delicate surgery and I personally am very scared that it won't work but I'm trying to have faith in God that he will give us the gift he took and let us have a rainbow baby. Then after his appt we met up with friends at apple bees it was so nice they are the nicest people ever! and angel parents as well :) so thats so nice having people to talk to that understand what your going through. then we got back to my moms house and i had the girls help and we picked up and cleaned the bedrooms and got ready for bed now they are sleeping tomorrow is the last day we can do things then it'll be in the house for a few days then home to NC :) thanks for reading love you all :)
Sunday, January 8, 2012
weekend
well today we got up got ready and went to the mall... I got my eyebrows waxed finally :) then stopped and got lunch and spent time with my mom and rex. we started to get the girls back into their routine. They have been super whiney lately and Im pretty sure its because they aren't on their schedule. well we started tonight it took an entire hr to get savanna down and a lil longer for madelyn. we are planning for madelyns birthday party here in MD the 14th but it doesn't look like its gonna really be a party hopefully at least my brother and his family can come. theres a lot going on here I can't believe my baby girl is going to be 2! it seems like we just got pregnant with her. This week coming up is going to be long we have to go a hour away tomorrow for hubbys pre op. then meeting up with another angel mommy :) and her hubby one of the best people i have met in a LOOOONG TIME. the girls bedtime is 8-830 so hopefully were not to late at hubbys apt tomm kinda nervous and getting really nervous about his surgery and praying that it works please keep us in your prayers that it will work and we will be able to conceive and have a healthy baby again. well I think I am going to go to bed now :)
good night
god bless <3
thinking of my sweet cameron every moment I love you baby boy!
good night
god bless <3
thinking of my sweet cameron every moment I love you baby boy!
Saturday, January 7, 2012
trip tires and stress
So yesterday we headed from Ohio well we had to fill up our back tires the day before cuz they were low well we figured well its cold here so thats normal. WE were WRONG! the next morning we had to get air AGAIN.. this should not of happened in under 10 hrs from 11pm-7am we long a lot of air. to the point our PSI warning came on. so we filled up got about an hr away and the warning came on again.. so we filled up by this time I was stressing cuz we were traveling to MD and filling up every hr was not possible when driving through mountains. so we drove about 2 hrs with the warning on. I texted my mom and asked her what we could do she mentioned fix a flat.. so the first gas station that we came to we stoped hubs went in and found something like it that also puts air in your tires. after that it held for the trip. We were both very concerned our steering wheel was shaking horribly, and we just didnt know why. So we Got to my Step-dads house stayed there for 2-3 hrs went out to the car and the PSI was from 38 to 20! just from sitting there so we used his air compressor and filled up and went to my moms house. We got there okay and tire pressure held but after we parked and the car sat for a hr the hubs went out to get something and checked it by that time it was okay it went from 38-30. then he checked it before we went to bed and it was 28 we figured it should hold till morning to where we can get new tires. Well we got up this morning around 8 he went out to the car and said babe call Rex we cant go anywhere PSI is at 3!!! so my mom and Rex came to the resuce again! brought the air compressor and put air in well we drove it to rexs then Rob and Rex went and took the van to honda around noon. to get new tires we knew we needed them but we didnt have the money we have "run-flats" on the van (not by choice just the model n yr of van). So thats about 250 a tire and 109 an hr for labor ! so all together 730-740 bucks for 2 new tires! stressed over money as it is living on a military budget paying for our sons headstone child support and having 2 young kids. we need new tires! they were so bad the gel that makes them run-flats was seeping through the tires. that has been our trip for the past 2 days so stressful and monday we drive an hr away for hubbys surgery consult
thanks for reading
<3 always
thanks for reading
<3 always
Thursday, January 5, 2012
jan 4th/jan 5
The day was very uneventful. We played in the house and the girls n I took long naps till 530pm! while daddy played video games. Then we went to grandma belindas house and hung out there and then went to dinner with her at pizza hut we didn't go to bed till after midnight so like i said our day was very uneventful.
Today we are packing up doing laundry and getting ready for the trip back to maryland tomorrow :)
I can't wait to go visit my baby boys grave and put new flowers down things have been okay I have had my good and bad days I miss him so muh all the time the girls are talking to him more and more. I know he is with jesus it just isn't fair all these people hurt their babies and they keep their babies. and yet people like me that want our babies and love them everyday from the day they are conceived get them taken away :(
Today we are packing up doing laundry and getting ready for the trip back to maryland tomorrow :)
I can't wait to go visit my baby boys grave and put new flowers down things have been okay I have had my good and bad days I miss him so muh all the time the girls are talking to him more and more. I know he is with jesus it just isn't fair all these people hurt their babies and they keep their babies. and yet people like me that want our babies and love them everyday from the day they are conceived get them taken away :(
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
jan 3 playing in the snow
so we took the big girls back to their Mom yesterday instead of today cuz it was snowing bad and they were calling up to 10-12 by their house n 8 by robs dad. Today we got up went to walmart cuz the girls needed snow boots and madelyn needed snow pants we got back to robs dads and got the girls ready and played in the snow for a while they had so much fun we have a huge snowball fight with them they made snow angels ate the snow its amazing watching them grow and smile everyday just having fun and learning while they play. We came inside to warm up and dry off. Madelyn fell asleep not to long after sitting down to snuggle with me. Savanna decided she was still hungry after lunch. So I made her a sandwhich banana and some trail mix ... then madelyn woke up I worked out then we went back to the store to pick up some things we forgot. that was pretty much our day now we are sitting here relaxing waiting for the girls to go to bed Oh and my wonderful hubby got me crochet stuff so I can learn to crochet :) i can't wait to start. Now off to put the girls down and then going to pack up our stuff while the diapers are in the washing
god bless everyone
god bless everyone
Sunday, January 1, 2012
2011
Okay so we had a very eventful 2011
First Madelyn turned the big 1 in january. savanna potty trained in january. we started to cloth diaper full time with madelyn. Madelyn had her second eye appt and her prescription hasn't changed and started wearing her glasses more. In March we found out the baby we were having was going to be a precious bouncing baby boy he was very active lil one in my belly. they girls were so excited that we were having a brother as well as us. we were in disbelief that we were finally having a boy. so we spent months preparing for a lil boy we sold all our girl stuff to buy boy stuff we had to get a new crib since the one we had had been recalled due to it being a dropside. we had a bump in our marriage this past yr. but that got resolved fast. and now we are happier than ever. My mom had major surgery and so we went to see her after. My cousin came and saw the girls around easter and we finally had our first easter as just a family. then my final trimester of my pregnancy got super busy with appts for the baby appts trying to find out why i was passing out I had 2 sleep tests don't and never found out why. I had a baby shower in may thanks to a friend . I felt horrible no one came but one person. then July came around i started having contractions every 5 mins on july 2nd we went to l &D 8 times before i had our angel . and they kept just sending us home. we celebrated our 2 yr ann july 10 ... then i was induced at 41 weeks with my still very active little boy. after 8 hrs of induction they broke my water but he still wouldn't drop. he went into distress and died on the way to the or for an emergency csection. so instead of bringing our handsome lil chunky baby boy home we were sending him for a autopsy and then to the funeral home. and planning for a funeral back home. august 6 we buried our beautifully baby boy. also 2 days prior to cameron dieing we lost robs grandmother. our entire family was under so much grief no one knew what to do after losing 2 very important people. within 2 days. then on savannas birthday (aug 13th) we moved back on base into new housing. and savanna started preschool 2 days a week for 3 hrs a day she abs loves going to school are still to this day trying to figure out how to be normal again. we live with cameron in our daily lives. september we made another trip to MD for madelyns eye appt and decorated camerons grave. then we went back to NC. In october we had a balloon release for infant and pregnancy loss day. it was so beautiful. we made the decision to try for a nother boy so rob is getting "unfixed" soon. even if we have a girl we will be happy as long as the baby is healthy and ALIVE BUT we are hoping for a boy. we celebrated thanksgiving with our amazing new neighbors then we came on leave for the holidays so we could see my brother in law before he ships out for deployment. and that brings up to the new yr we did a balloon release on NYE for camerons 5 months with all 4 kids and rob n I.
god bless and thank you for reading
amie
First Madelyn turned the big 1 in january. savanna potty trained in january. we started to cloth diaper full time with madelyn. Madelyn had her second eye appt and her prescription hasn't changed and started wearing her glasses more. In March we found out the baby we were having was going to be a precious bouncing baby boy he was very active lil one in my belly. they girls were so excited that we were having a brother as well as us. we were in disbelief that we were finally having a boy. so we spent months preparing for a lil boy we sold all our girl stuff to buy boy stuff we had to get a new crib since the one we had had been recalled due to it being a dropside. we had a bump in our marriage this past yr. but that got resolved fast. and now we are happier than ever. My mom had major surgery and so we went to see her after. My cousin came and saw the girls around easter and we finally had our first easter as just a family. then my final trimester of my pregnancy got super busy with appts for the baby appts trying to find out why i was passing out I had 2 sleep tests don't and never found out why. I had a baby shower in may thanks to a friend . I felt horrible no one came but one person. then July came around i started having contractions every 5 mins on july 2nd we went to l &D 8 times before i had our angel . and they kept just sending us home. we celebrated our 2 yr ann july 10 ... then i was induced at 41 weeks with my still very active little boy. after 8 hrs of induction they broke my water but he still wouldn't drop. he went into distress and died on the way to the or for an emergency csection. so instead of bringing our handsome lil chunky baby boy home we were sending him for a autopsy and then to the funeral home. and planning for a funeral back home. august 6 we buried our beautifully baby boy. also 2 days prior to cameron dieing we lost robs grandmother. our entire family was under so much grief no one knew what to do after losing 2 very important people. within 2 days. then on savannas birthday (aug 13th) we moved back on base into new housing. and savanna started preschool 2 days a week for 3 hrs a day she abs loves going to school are still to this day trying to figure out how to be normal again. we live with cameron in our daily lives. september we made another trip to MD for madelyns eye appt and decorated camerons grave. then we went back to NC. In october we had a balloon release for infant and pregnancy loss day. it was so beautiful. we made the decision to try for a nother boy so rob is getting "unfixed" soon. even if we have a girl we will be happy as long as the baby is healthy and ALIVE BUT we are hoping for a boy. we celebrated thanksgiving with our amazing new neighbors then we came on leave for the holidays so we could see my brother in law before he ships out for deployment. and that brings up to the new yr we did a balloon release on NYE for camerons 5 months with all 4 kids and rob n I.
god bless and thank you for reading
amie
visiting family
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